Category: Joke Board
15. Sorry I missed your e-mail. Not really, but it sounds nice to say, doesn't it?
14. I'm in the bathroom washing my balls. Why? Because I'm playing golf this afternoon, you perv.
13. I'm not at my desk, and you might have noticed that the new hottie from Accounting isn't at her desk, either. I'll be back when I can regain my strength.
12. Actually, I've been back for 6 months, but I can't figure out how to turn this damn thing off.
11. ... Disclaimer: Acknowledgment of receipt has no real bearing on when, or if, your message will actually be seen. It is the electronic equivalent of
a Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes letter.
10. Sorry, I'm away clearing brush at my ranch. Heck, I don't understand this fancy electrical messagificating stuff anyway.
9. Trapped in a four-walled cubicle with no water, no food, and a network embedded with porn-site-blocking software. SEND HELP!!
8. As of yesterday, I am no longer with the company. I will be helping expatriates from Nigeria to move large sums of money for a considerable fee, and
won't need to work with you suckers anymore. See ya, wouldn't want to be ya!
7. Nice try, Sparky, but the Olympics are on! Maybe I'll get back to you during rhythmic gymnastics.
6. By the time you receive this reply, I'll be in Sao Paolo banging a supermodel, swimming in high-grade coke and living off $12 million in absconded company
funds. So long, suckers!
5. I can't tell you where I am, but your wife says "Hi," and you're out of beer.
4. I don't have email access for the next two weeks because I'm visiting the Dalai Lama to spread his message of world peace. Just kidding! I'm actually
clubbing baby seals in Alaska.
3. I will be out on May 12, 2003 to celebrate "Mission Accomplished Day," then have short-term duty with the Reserves. I should be back soon.
2. I briefly escaped the cubicle maze, only to become disoriented upon seeing the face of the Shiny Yellow Sky God. But my fear of scary open spaces will
have me skittering back to the mundane security of my desk as fast as my fast as my harried paws will allow.
and the Number 1 Out-of-Office E-Mail We'd Like to See...
1. Dude, I am WAAAAYYYY too stoned to reply to emails today.
And Becky does it again! roflmao. 14, 9, and 4 were especially funny. 4 Was my favourite. *swings his club and misses*, Ah well, it's the bloody vegetarian option for me again tonight, I guess.
LOL Simon. Somehow I always knew you were the type to club those poor baby seals.
Thanks for this follow-up, Becky.
Lou
Yeah, these were funny 14 mande me laugh. but your last list is numbered part two when these were part two and the last one was part one, what happened there?
My first part 2 was meant to be a continuation of a list I posted a very long time ago. However, I couldn't find the old list once I had already posted part 2.
LMAO. Loved number fourteen.